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The First Installment of – Things That Happen in the Middle of Nowhere with Jenny From the Bunk

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So, I left camp today to trek out into the Berkshires to pick up a prescription. The Berkshires are absolutely stunning, but everyone drives really slow.

I mean slower than the speed limit, slow… like they aren’t actually driving to a destination. Even Siri was giving me lazy directions, alerting me milliseconds before my turn, one time she was like, “Ooops, you were supposed to turn about a mile back but I was too enamored with the scenery to mention it, my bad.”

“Whatever Siri!”…

As I got further and further from civilization, I noticed that when you push “Seek” on the radio it usually just cycles through the stations a couple times before it lands on something Country or an Evangelist. Because I truly hate country music (sorry Country fans), I ended up donating $200 to some mobile church. I hope it helps them get the new tires.

Then I got to a small apothecary-esque pharmacy and this conversation ensued:

Person at pharmacy: I’m sorry ma’am, the prescription you drove 40 minutes to get and waited 30 minutes for can not be processed because the birthday on your license does not match the one in our system.

Me: I’m pretty sure the one on my license is correct.

Person: Well, someone put it in the system wrong then, so it needs to be changed.

Me: So, you’re saying it needs to be changed on your end?

Person: Yep.

Me: Wouldn’t you be the one who could make that happen.

Person: Yep…

Long pause where she stared into space and I stared in her direction.

Person: I need to wait for the pharmacist to get back so that I can confirm whether I need to change it or not, before I can sell you your prescription.

Me: So, you need the pharmacist to change it?

Person: No ma’am (she said, frustrated, as if I was both annoying and ignorant) I need the pharmacist to confirm that it needs to be changed before I can sell it to you. He will be back from lunch soon.

Me: (after about 3 minutes of slowly simmering) Pardon me, I have to get back, so may I suggest that you proactively change it in the system, since it’s wrong anyway, and then perhaps you could sell me my prescription without needing to confirm with the pharmacist as it will already be done.

Person: MA’AM, please have some patience, I’m working on it.

I watched her stare at the screen blankly for five more minutes before she started to type. She started to process the sale of my prescription (I was overjoyed) just then, the pharmacist came back and she halted, brought him to the computer and explained how she had changed my birthday to the correct day and asked for approval to complete the transaction.

A man behind me, who had 4 teeth and was humming the tune to Deliverance said very eloquently, “This needed approval? I can only imagine your frustration.”

“Thank you,” I said. Then I asked the person at the counter if she could sell me some ether.

She said she’d check with the pharmacist.

I took my pills and ran.

PS it was more of a Rite Aid than an apothecary — if you must know.

The post The First Installment of – Things That Happen in the Middle of Nowhere with Jenny From the Bunk appeared first on The Suburban Jungle .

       

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